PTERODACTYLOID MAN'S FLIGHT TO PARIS
By Jeffery Marzi
Radon the Pterodactyloid was in the guest room in the White House thinking about the big flight.
He said, “After I got my body simulated to be a cyborg body with anaconda snake muscles, I was able to flap my wings faster and harder. I do not fear the AIDS virus.”
To the assembled reporters and photographers this was a BIG SCOOP! Radon remembered when he was working postal service in Miami. The weather was cold and windy that day. But the express mail had to be delivered to the Post Office in Orlando, rain or shine! “I had difficulty flapping my wings. But I carried a parachute for emergency. After landing in an orange tree I designed to take the mail train to Orlando. Riding on it I met somebody who works in the septic business, Johnny Septic, who asked why I was taking a train. I said, ‘I'm forced to by the weather. I can fly faster than this train moves. I used to fly long distance. And I want to say this to you: the Post Office has a navigational computer on my crest to navigate over the ocean. It's equipped with a globed satellite system. And Johnny, I can fly nonstop to Washington, D.C. I love to fly; it's in my blood.' After the train stopped it suddenly came to me: I want to do the ultimate flight. Across the ocean!”
Through a lot of static, he made a phone call to a hospital and arranged to have a simulation done. When this was complete, he made a strong wind in the doctor's office by flapping his wings. His support, Banker Rich, whose grandfather had flown the Atlantic, said, “I know you are happy about this. But you have to be a monster in a Japanese monster movie. I remember one that had two pterodactyls flap their wings and destroy Tokyo.”
Melissa, the First Lady, helped him to acquire the anaconda muscles. He was impressed with them; he'd seen one crush a car. Melissa had been on the Titanic during the disaster.
Radon made a speech:
“I will be departing soon to do the ultimate flight. I'll be by myself, but you will be with me, because of all the hard work. We'll fly together!”
The President called. He said, “Just 36 hours ago your old friend Griff the Griffin departed from Paris and is heading here. At the present he is over the Atlantic. And he may be the first living being with wings to cross it. So will you proceed?”
He wasn't certain he would. But on the news he heard Griff got ice on his wings. He was carrying three bags of chocolate bars, one compass and an Atlas of the World. Just before he ended up in the water he was looking at the Atlas and a strong wind blew it out of his hands. The compass he was using fell apart in his hands. He was lucky to be alive!
Now, in the White House, he was disturbed by the noise of reporters typing. How could he think? He remembered the day he carried the preacher in a harness and after they landed the preacher said, “I'm closer to the Lord. You should be more careful with me—you almost dropped me!”
Radon said, “I carry all my customers in my harness just like a hang glider!”
They gathered on the White House lawn for his departure. He flapped his wings to warm up, thanked all involved, and departed, just barely clearing the fence. Everyone was cheering. Headlines were soon rolling: RADON IS ON HIS WAY!
Out over the ocean, he saw a tremendous ship disaster with the people singing on it. It was just like the Titanic. All he could do was fly past. He received a radio transmission from the U.S. Coast Guard.
“That ship you reported WAS the Titanic! We remember the reports! You play jokes with us! We saw you on TV and can track you. You flying lizard, you'd better not fool with us! You'll be extinct like the other dynos!”
He decided the sighting was caused by a hallucinogenic effect from his life elements.
The sea with its isolation was beautiful to one flying over it. He was very peaceful. Then he saw a UFO on the horizon. He got scared and wanted to hide inside a cloud. But it didn't work. The Martians found him! He thought he'd lost them and they were going back to Mars and he reported it.
The cyborg Egyptians captured him in a flying pyramid. Their star was dying and they'd crash landed in Egypt. King Hut had Radon mummified and sent back through time to discover the secret of saving a Red Star.
When he'd finished testing their time machine they released him and he said, “Two times abducted! What a night! It was kind of fun.”
Arriving in Paris, he said, “What are all these lights? What's the event?”
They were for his arrival. The Secret Service gave him an award token from the First Lady. He was the first living winged thing to cross the North Atlantic Ocean!